Please click here to order your copy of Worth the Ride: My Journey with Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy. All proceeds go to Parent Project Muscular Dystrophy (PPMD)

Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Trick or Treat!


Happy Halloween, everyone! Check out the picture of me and my sister, Amy, from Halloween way back in 1985, when I was seven years old. That year, our mother decided that we would not wear store-bought costumes and ordered the pattern for the Crayola Crayon costumes. I'd say they turned out pretty well!

Obviously, the photo is from my pre-wheelchair days. Unless you saw me walking, there wasn't a whole lot separating me from other children that age. It saddens me to know that today, there are still 7-year-old boys with missing teeth, who will eventually need motorized wheelchairs and all of the other things (tracheostomies, ventilators, feeding tubes, etc.) that I need to live. Fortunately, such technology exists. But wouldn't it be great if all of those little boys could grow up and never need any of that stuff? For their sake, I hope that day arrives soon.

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

A Pat on the Back


Congratulations go out to loyal Winheld's World reader and my friend Pat Moeschen, who was recently named Wal-Mart's 2007 New Hampshire Teacher of the Year.

I first met Pat, who has Becker muscular dystrophy (which is closely related to Duchenne's), at the Parent Project Muscular Dystrophy conference a few months ago and was impressed with his positive energy and can-do attitude. No doubt these qualities are what make Pat so successful as a band teacher at the Woodbury School in Salem, New Hampshire, where he teaches sixth through eighth grades. For most of us, those years are often very difficult. I'm sure his students, past and present, will attest to the fact that a teacher like Pat can make all the difference. As someone with a disability, I know that every day presents its challenges. My hat goes off to Pat for facing those challenges head on and with great success.

Congratulations, my friend!

Thursday, October 25, 2007

In Case of Fire


Under normal circumstances, today's world is pretty accessible for those of us with disabilities. But in a natural disaster or even just a really bad storm, all bets are off.

As I was watching coverage of the California wildfires yesterday, I saw an interview with a sign-language interpreter talking about the difficulty in making the deaf community aware of evacuations in the area. I got to thinking about what would happen to someone like me in the event of an emergency like that. It's similar to my feelings when I watched on TV, as the Hurricane Katrina disaster unfolded. In all honesty, it was clear to me that there's a good chance that I probably would not have survived.

I shudder with fear every time a huge snowstorm is predicted. In the event of a power failure, I cannot power my ventilator and I can't charge its back-up batteries. We do have a gas-powered generator, but in a prolonged power outage, what would happen when we ran out of fuel? The obvious answer is to throw all of my supplies in my van and drive to the nearest medical center. But what if roads are impassable? Or what if I couldn't even get out of my house, as in the case of a big snowstorm? You can try calling 911, but are they going to be able to rescue you when there's three feet of snow on the ground? Take me out of my wheelchair and I'm bedridden. And consider this -- I live with my family. What if I lived alone and depended on people to get me out of bed in the morning? Firefighters could knock on my door all day, but I wouldn't be able to get to the front door to alert them of my situation.

Natural disasters like the fires raging in California are difficult enough for people without disabilities. Having a disability is just an added challenge. However, in every tragedy, it seems that you can almost always count on the kindness of strangers. You read about it all the time when things like this happen. Without such assistance, people with disabilities, who might ordinarily be quite independent, may be less likely than other people to get through such a tragedy.

If anyone out there with a disability has survived a natural disaster, please feel free to share your story...

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

A Captive Audience


Oddly enough, when I talk, people actually listen to me. Well, unless I'm at the dinner table with my family! Today, I addressed a group of pulmonary nurses at Children's Hospital of Philadelphia (CHOP). Drawing upon my experiences as both a teenager and an adult, I talked about what it's like for someone like me to be hospitalized.

For example, at home, my environment has been adapted to my needs. In the hospital, there's not much that I can do for myself. I can't change the channel on the TV. I can't read anything because I can't hold a book or turn its pages. I can't feed myself. I feel bad asking the nurses for help with these things because I'm not their only patient and they have more important things to do than to find me something interesting to watch on TV.

Help using the bathroom isn't something I have a problem asking for, but there's nothing like having a full bladder and you have to wait for the nurse to arrive. As a result, I would drink as little as possible. However, eight hours later, they would want to catherize me because I had not urinated!

Even calling the nurse is an issue because I cannot physically push the nurse call button. At CHOP, they now have sip-and-puff devices that allow you to trigger the nurse call systems with your breath, so that does help -- unless, of course, the device slips out of the range of your mouth.

One of the nurses brought up the issue of positioning. For many of us, it can take a lot of time to get comfortable in bed. I know that I often need my head moved several times. The pillows supporting my legs need to be placed in exact position. It can be very frustrating for caregivers.

"But trust me," I told them, "We find it just as frustrating as you do!"

On the subject of positioning, I also talked about the fear that people like I have of being moved by nurses because many of us have contracted arms and legs. It's not just that my legs are locked in place; it hurts when they are moved too much. One wrong move and I could be injured.

But I think that the biggest message that I tried to get across was that when you are in the hospital, you tend to act differently than you would at home. I explained how I became a lot more emotional when I was in the hospital for two months. Things that ordinarily would not have bothered me did just that. I only wished the nurses and doctors could have known me outside of the hospital because they would have liked me!

During that hospitalization, I was an adult. So if it was bad for me then, just imagine what it's like for a child. One of my most vivid memories from my hospitalization at age 15, following spinal fusion surgery (other than being in pain), was one of the nurses wanting to give me a bath. I felt awful and the last thing I wanted to do was get washed. All I wanted was to be left alone and I was less than pleasant to deal with. At that moment, whether I smelled badly was hardly the first thing on my mind.

Not a fun experience, to say the least. Let's just say that I was much more pleasant today -- and I smelled a whole lot better, too!

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

All Flyered Up


With the Phillies' brief playoff run over and the Eagles' season seemingly in disarray, it's time for some Flyers hockey! After a dismal season last year, the team made some major upgrades and they figure to make the playoffs this year and hopefully do some real damage. Tonight, I had a chance to check them out in person, as they took on the Atlanta Thrashers at the Wachovia Center. See me all dressed for the occasion in my authentic Flyers jersey (which makes me look huge, by the way).

As you can see from the view in the picture here, my father and I had great seats. The players looked huge and the puck was easy enough to follow. The only problem I had was the frigid temperature inside the arena (it is home to an ice hockey team after all). My driving hand got so cold that by the end of the game, I could barely control my wheelchair -- even after putting my driving hand in a wool sock for most of the game.

The Wachovia Center is very wheelchair-friendly, though it wasn't always that way. Eleven years ago, when the building opened, wheelchair users like myself loved the view -- until we realized we could not see ANYTHING when people in front of us stood up at exciting points of the game. Simply amazing how such an error could be made in the construction of a facility costing hundreds of millions of dollars! A class action lawsuit followed, resulting in the installation of elevated platforms, accessible with use of lifts like the one pictured above.

I suppose all is well that ends well, as the sightlines for those of us in wheelchairs are now pretty spectacular. Good thing, too, because last night's game was definitely worth seeing, as the Orange and Black easily dispatched the winless Thrashers, 4-0.

LET'S GO FLYERS!!!

Friday, October 12, 2007

This Won't Hurt A Bit


Unless you were the one getting stuck in the arm with a needle! That's right, folks, roll up your sleeves and say ouch: it's flu shot time! My doctor (in the photo) was kind enough to make a housecall today, as getting in and out of my van for something so quick is a bit of a hassle.

For those of us with Duchenne's, getting an annual influenza vaccine is a must. Getting the flu could lead to life-threatening pneumonia because the muscles we use to breathe are too weak to cough up secretions (mucus). I have never developed pneumonia (knock on wood), thanks in part to the flu shot and also because my doctor is quick to prescribe antibiotics when I get a cold. Antibiotics won't cure a cold, but can prevent a secondary infection that could lead to pneumonia.

The shot didn't really hurt today (thanks, doc), but I know I'll get the usual aches later from the vaccine. Certainly better than getting the flu, though. The only thing I had to remember was to get the shot in my right arm. I used to be concerned that would impact my ability to drive my wheelchair (it doesn't). However, getting the shot in the left arm is worse because I get rolled onto my left side when I'm in bed.

Anyway, get your flu shots, people. And don't even think of poking me in the arm, or you'll get a sore foot, too!

Thursday, October 11, 2007

The Few. The Proud. Me?

From the department of they said I'd never do it...

After receiving a brochure in the mail yesterday from the U.S. Marines Corps, I figured what the hell and headed for a local recruitment office this afternoon, nurse in tow.

Though the office was not wheelchair accessible, a staff sergeant was kind enough to come outside and chat with me. Turns out that I won't be a marine anytime soon, as you can't be older than 28 to enlist. Well, that and the fact that there's no way I'd ever pass the required physical examination!

As I was talking to the sergeant, who had been wounded in combat in Iraq, an officer fully clad in marine attire walked outside. My nurse pointed at me and joked, "He's going to sign up!"

My face turned a shade of crimson.

"Great," he said with a wide smile, "There's a bus leaving in an hour!"

All joking aside, I thought it would be a perfect opportunity to find out what someone like myself can do to support the troops. Say what you want about the war in Iraq, but you have to respect the courage and determination of the men and women serving in that country. Unfortunately, some of them are returning home with serious injuries. I have always felt that those who suddenly become disabled have it a lot more difficult than those of us who have grown up with disabilities.

Still, I have been able to live a productive life despite a serious disability and I hope to be able to share that message with soldiers who are recovering from serious injuries and may be wondering what sort of opportunities exist. To that end, I offered my assistance and provided the sergeant with my contact information. We'll see what happens, so stay tuned.

I didn't get on that bus today and might not be able to serve my country in the way described in the brochure, but I can't think of a better way to serve than to help those who have risked their lives.

If anyone reading this wants to offer his or her assistance as well, please let me know and I will be happy to share any information that I learn.

Saturday, October 06, 2007

Breaking Bread, Burmese Style


Winheld's World has become exotic lately -- well, at least when it comes to trying different foods. Tonight, I had dinner at a Burmese restaurant in Philadelphia's Chinatown district. Rather fitting in light of the current situation in Myanmar (Burma's official name). What better way to show solidarity with the Burmese people than to sample their cuisine.

I liked this restaurant from the second I rolled up the perfectly accessible ramp leading to its entrance. Inside, the hostess seated us at a table that was easy for me to get to, without my having to ask other people to move so I could get by. Even better, she pulled the chair away from the left side of the table -- as if she knew that I like the person feeding me to sit to my right!

The food certainly didn't disappoint, either. My favorite was the Banana Leaf Fish (pictured above). I figured that instead of another photo of yours truly, I would show the food I ate. Sorry if this makes you hungry!

The Northern Burma Fried Noodles (left) and the Jungle Chicken (below) were very tasty, too. We also had the Thousand Layer Bread with Curry Chicken Dip, as well as the Calamari Ala Burma Salad, but my dining companions and I were so hungry that we forgot to take a picture of those items beforehand!

A great time was had by all, which made it a bit easier to digest the Phillies' playoff elimination. As we like to say in Philly, there's always next year...

Monday, October 01, 2007

Lifesaver


If it weren't for my defibrillator, I might not be talking to you now -- or for much of the past month. At a routine check today of the device that has been implanted in my chest for 2 1/2 years, I learned that it may very well have saved my life a few weeks ago when my heart rhythm apparently became dangerously irregular.

I felt neither the irregular heartbeat nor the action that the defibrillator took to correct the problem. The defibrillator did not need to shock me, as it was fortunately able to "pace" me out of the dangerous rhythm. Without the device, the irregular rhythm could have been fatal.

Obviously, this is good news because it means that the device worked and that having it implanted was the right decision. On the other hand, it doesn't make me feel so good that that I had a problem that required the device to work. But my electrophysiologist and nurse practitioner assured me that having one episode like this does not necessarily mean that my condition is getting worse. Let's hope they're right!

In a previous entry, I wrote about what happens at my electrophysiology appointments. There is a picture of a device similar to the one in my chest, as well as the wand that is used to download information from it. What I didn't show was the machine to which the wand is connected. At left is a photo of said machine.

You can see the computer screen more closely in the picture below. Be sure to click on it for an enlarged version (nice editing job by one Winheld's World reader). At the top of the screen is an EKG reading at the time that the photo was taken. Below are some of the settings. At a heart rate of 165 bpm (beats per minute), the device is set to monitor or pace; at 185 bpm, it will pace; and at 200 bpm, it will shock me. If you look in the white box, "Last V-Tachy episode on 09-SEP-2007" which was when the device took action. ("V-Tachy" is an abbreviation for ventricular tachycardia, a fast arrhythmia)

The machine also prints out a report with more detailed information. As I have said many times before, it's really cool technology. I just wish my life didn't depend upon it. However, I'm feeling very thankful today that I have it!

Sunday, September 30, 2007

NL East Champs!


The last time I was able to say that about the Phillies, it was 1993 and I was a sophomore in high school. But Winheld's World is full of excitement this evening as the Fightin' Phils have won the 2007 National League East division title!

I'll admit that I had my doubts on more than one occasion this season, but Phillies shortshop and MVP candidate Jimmy Rollins never did. His preseason declaration that the Phillies were "the team to beat" angered the New York Mets and their fans, but it turns out that he was right after all.

It sure has been a wild ride. Let's hope it continues...

Thursday, September 27, 2007

Summer's Last Hurrah?


With today's weather more befitting of summer than fall, it was the perfect opportunity to get out on the Schuylkill River Trail once again. Pictured at left is Philadelphia's famed Boathouse Row (photo courtesy of Frank, my nurse/photographer). This time, I played tour guide for my friend Kimi (pictured below). With two wheelchairs, it required some extra coordination to avoid bicyclists. "You go first," we took turns saying to each other as they approached, full speed ahead. We also had to make sure we drove slowly enough for the ambulatory members of our party (a.k.a our nurses)!

All in all, it was a perfect day. Gorgeous weather, nice scenery, and great company. Of course, the day was even better because those Fightin' Phils defeated the Atlanta Braves tonight. With the New York Mets' loss, that means the Phillies are now tied for first place in their division!

Tuesday, September 25, 2007

A Visit to the Kingdom


Every now and then, I need to escape from my world, and tonight I certainly did that, as I attended a sneak preview "The Kingdom," starring Jamie Foxx, Chris Cooper, and the very lovely Jennifer Garner. The film follows an FBI team that travels to Saudi Arabia to investigate a brutal terrorist attack on a U.S. housing compound.

It's a truly gripping story, but what I found most interesting was the beginning of the film, which offers a video timeline of U.S. involvement in the Middle East. I didn't realize that oil wasn't discovered in Saudi Arabia until 1938. It emphasizes the sad fact that other than protecting Israel, our ONLY reason for caring about the Middle East is oil.

Though I usually go to the movies quite a bit, this was my first in a while. It was well worth it, although this theater had "stadium seating," which I despise. For wheelchair users, the seating areas are entirely too close to the screen. Some theaters, such as the one I was at tonight, have an elevator to go to the top, but you could practically get a nose bleed at that height!

Anyway, back to the movie. I highly recommend it because it truly makes you think. The last two lines of dialogue alone truly captured the essence of the fight against Islamic extremism. By the film's end, I was ready to return to my own, much safer, world. But with such extremism out there, how safe is it?

Monday, September 24, 2007

Stuck With Me


Well, for the next year or so, anyway, Caroline and Jin, first year students at the University of Pennsylvania School of Medicine, will be. Lucky them!

As participants in the LEAPP (Longitudinal Experience to Appreciated Patient Perspectives) Program, a required part of their curriculum, the students will keep in regular contact with me. They will visit with me at home at least once, go to some of my doctor appointments (I have plenty of those), and even see me in the hospital if I spend any time there, though I certainly hope I won't.

Course Director Dr. Paul Lanken, who addressed volunteers today, acknowledged that some doctors are obviously better from the technical side of things than they are at interacting with patients. But at Penn, he explained, the goal is for aspiring doctors to learn to truly empathize with patients.

So what do I get in return? Aside from knowing that I'm helping future doctors and patients, I get a captive audience that actually wants to listen to my inane wisdom and pathetic humor. Hey, I couldn't even PAY my own sisters to do that!

Welcome to Winheld's World, Caroline and Jin, and good luck with your studies...

Saturday, September 22, 2007

A Fundamental Right


I was dismayed by news today of President Bush's planned veto of legislation to expand a health insurance program for children whose families cannot afford private insurance.

Bush contends that expanding the Children's Health Insurance Program (CHIP) would be too costly and would extend government-covered insurance to children in families who can afford private coverage. Proponents, including a bipartisan majority in Congress say all they're doing is expanding coverage to more children who would not have been covered. Bush also argues that it sounds like a push for completely federalized health care.

Even if that were true, would that be such a bad thing? Certainly, all children deserve health insurance. It should have nothing to do with whether their parents can afford it; no child chooses his or her parents. But what about universal coverage for adults, too? I believe healthcare is a fundamental human right. Healthcare should have nothing to do with your income. Some people don't agree. To them, I say this: wait until you have a serious health issue and you'll understand.

Though it's not perfect in other countries that have it, I would like to see a single-payer system that eliminates insurance companies, but let's be practical -- the insurance industry would never allow it. If we need to include them in the solution, fine. However, the point is that everyone should be covered; I don't care how we go about it.

My medical situation may not be the norm, but if the federal government guaranteed health insurance, I'd like to think I'd be more likely to receive 24-hour nursing coverage, which would allow me to live on my own. I currently get 16 hours a day through my family's costly private insurance. A state waiver plan exists, but it doesn't reimburse nursing agencies as well. Do you think private insurance companies want to pay for eight more hours of care each day? No, and I can't blame them. My care is expensive. I feel that's where my government should step in.

Bottom line for me: until every American has health insurance I cannot say the United States is greatest country in the world.

Thursday, September 20, 2007

No News Is Good News (I Guess)


Today I had a routine check-up with my cardiologist. Not unexpectedly, the doctor was pleased with how I'm doing. But somehow, that never makes me feel a whole lot better. The problem is that with Duchenne's, there seems to be no way to predict when things will take a turn for the worse. I want to be able to recognize the signs so we can at least try to do something before it's too late.

I communicated these thoughts to my doctor. While he can't give me the kind of answer I want -- such answers simply don't exist -- he offered some useful perspective. The two threats I face from a cardiac standpoint are fatal arrhythmias and heart failure. My pacemaker/defibrillator offers protection from the former and he has me on the right medications for the latter, which reduce workload on the heart, thus slowing down the rate at which heart muscle breaks down. We can look at things like energy level whether I wake up feeling short of breath as a signs of my condition. So far, so good. As the doctor reminded me, "You're not even supposed to be here."

And he's right -- things didn't look so good five years ago this month, when I first arrived at his office. But I'm still here. So, maybe the best answer is to get out there and live my life. It's what I've always tried to do. Why change that now? After all, I might be sticking around for a while. I'll certainly need to if I want to ever see a sports championship in Philadelphia!

Next appointment, I will have my annual echocardiogram, which will tell if there has been any change in my heart function. The date of that appointment? February 14th -- Valentine's Day. How appropriate!

Sunday, September 16, 2007

Dream On


For the better part of 15 years, Winheld's World (not the blog) has been passionate about sports, especially when it comes to the four major professional franchises that call Philadelphia home. For our international readers, that would be the Phillies (MLB), Eagles (NFL), 76ers (NBA), and Flyers (NHL). No matter what difficulties I have faced in life, I have always been able to turn to sports to not only to distract me, but to entertain, captivate -- and, yes, aggravate me! After all, a championship hasn't been won by a team from Philly in 24 years!

My passion is probably not what it once was. (How much heartbreak can one endure?) But yesterday, I stumbled across the above video clip on YouTube, a montage of the highs and (mostly) lows of Philly sports in recent decades, set to Aerosmith's "Dream On." I can't get enough of it, as it serves as a powerful reminder of how much I still love my sports, and how much I still want to see one of my teams win a championship.

Well, despite an exciting three-game sweep by the Phillies over the hated Mets in New York, that doesn't appear likely to happen anytime soon. But until then, I'll continue to watch -- and dream on...

Sunday, September 09, 2007

The Tradition Continues




Football is back! That means Sunday afternoons watching the Philadelphia Eagles with my father. As you can see, we were in mid-season form today for the Birds' season opener against the Green Bay Packers, clad in Eagles jerseys, Coronas in hand (as if actually drink beer), cheering for McNabb, Westbrook, Dawkins and the gang. Dad can't catch a break. Every time he buys a jersey with a player's name on the back, that player ends up being cut from the team (that would be Trotter this year)!

Growing up, I was never a sports fan, probably because I couldn't play. That was until I started watching Eagles games with my father 15 years ago. Soon, football became an addiction. Over the years, I've seen the lows -- losing to the hated Dallas Cownoys on game-ending botched field goal attempt -- and the highs -- winning the NFC championship game against the Atlanta Falcons.

Despite today's heartbreaking 16-13 loss to the Packers (we're used to this in Philly), this season looks to be a promising one for the Eagles. Could this be the year they win that elusive Super Bowl? It should be another wild ride. Let's just hope it doesn't test my defibrillator along the way!

Thursday, September 06, 2007

GI Josh


The less I need to see my gastroenterologist, the better (hey, those are his words), but every now and then, a follow-up is a good idea, and today was the day.
While Duchenne's primarily affects skeletal and cardiac muscles, it also involves smooth muscles such as those in the GI tract. I should know. Several years ago, it resulted in a serious constipation problem that caused me to stop eating and lose over 30 pounds. A few years ago, I developed acid reflux disease. But with medications, both issues are under control (knock on wood). The doctor was pleased and said he'd see me in nine months -- don't worry, I'm not pregnant!

With that, I decided to subject the ol' system to some spicy Mexican food at a nearby restaurant on the campus of the University of Pennsylvania (see picture of me across from the Quadrangle). Well, I sure felt old today, knowing that I'm nearly too old for most of the women I saw! And while the spicy food sat well with my stomach, that certainly did not!

Sunday, September 02, 2007

Not So Super Market


When it comes to food, they say that cooking is an art, baking a science, and shopping a pain in the ass! Actually, I added that last one, but if you're in a wheelchair, you probably know what I mean.

In remembrance of the two year anniversary of the Hurricane Katrina disaster, I thought I would prepare one of my favorite New Orleans-inspired dishes: chicken and sausage gumbo. For inquiring minds, the recipe I use comes from the Food Network's Rachael Ray. I know of at least one loyal Winheld's World reader who will disagree, but Ms. Ray can cook for me any day. Not only does she know her way around the kitchen, she's also very easy on the eyes! But I digress.

The particular supermarket where I shop is somewhat pricey, but it's usually not too crowded and the aisles are relatively wide. So much for all of that. When we got there, all of the accessible parking spaces, which have room for me to put down my lift, were taken. Because it was beautiful outside, we parked at the far end of the parking lot.

"No one's going to park next to us," I reasoned, "There are plenty of other spaces."

Naturally, when we came out of the store, some idiot had parked right next to us! As a result, we had to back out of the space and then load me into the van.

Inside the store, it wasn't a whole lot better. Driving through aisles was like playing dodgeball. People get in my way no matter what I do. And it's okay for people to stand in the middle of the aisle to look for items, but if I do that, I get the evil eye.

"Sorry," I say, moving aside, but I'm really not. I have every right to take my time, too.

Things got a little dicey over in the seafood department when a store employee pulling a hand-truck nearly walked backward into me! Most upsetting was that in avoiding hitting him, I missed the free samples being given out nearby!

But even if it was a pain at the store, it will all be worth it when I taste that gumbo. I'm already hungry!

Sunday, August 26, 2007

Guys' (and Girl's) Night Out


It was probably the hottest night of the year, but that didn't stop a family tradition.

Every year, in honor of my grandfather's birthday, the men in the family attend a Phillies game. The tradition started when he turned 70; this year, he turned 81 (his actual birthday was a couple of months ago). Normally, I bring a nurse, but this year, I decided just to have my father help me. Nothing against my nurses, but it was nice to be with just my family for a change. The extra ticket went to my now baseball-adoring sister, Amy.

Pictured above (from left) are my father; cousin, Benny; grandfather; me; Amy; and uncle, Steve. (Yes, I know there's some guy's head behind Uncle Steve, but he's not part of our family. At least not that I am aware!)

Of course, in typical Philadelphia fashion, the Phillies failed to cooperate on this
night. But my father and I deserve some of the blame for that.

With the Phillies leading 2-0 halfway through the game, my father turned to me and said, "This guy's pitching great. He hasn't given up anything."

"Dad, stop it," I warned him, "They'll hear you."

Naturally, the next pitch ended up sailing over the fence for a homerun. Still 2-1, Phils, though.

My sin was worse.

"Don't walk people," I said out loud as Phillies relief pitcher Tom "Flash" Gordon ran a deep count to the first batter he faced in the eighth inning, "Make the guy hit the ball. Worst he'll do is tie the game."

And in a flash, that was exactly what happened: a game-tying homerun! My father just looked at me. It all spiraled downhill from there. Final score: 4-3, San Diego Padres.

But, hey, at least I was with my family, having fun. It's a good thing, too, because otherwise I may have jumped off the Walt Whitman Bridge, wheelchair and all, the way the Phillies played tonight!